haircut hangover

truly shitty day.

cramps.

electric bill overdue.

dad called to ask if we can "talk" about my future. i will inevitably wind up disappointing my dad and yelling and being lectured to and hating myself and then making up and crying and all that dense heartfelt stuff. not in the mood to do this. can we please reschedule this talk when i'm busy being marginally successful at the next phase in my life?

haircut hangover. my hair is roughly 7 inches shorter than it was yesterday and the initial euphoric mental hysteria that swaddles a new haircut is quickly ending. do i look like a mom? do i look 18 going on 45? do i look like i'm wearing romeo's wig? aye, me!

when asked what i wanted, i said "please cut off at least 5 inches. i have thin as a pin hair and it lies flat. can i get volume somehow? oh yeah, and please don't shave the back of my neck, it's a pain in the ass to grow out. maybe below my ears? kind of edgy. messy! unkempt. yeah, like youthful, like an artist, but not lesbionic. cute. sweet. wild child hair."

the messy disrepair of viv albertine, circa 1979, coupled with the innocence of jackie o's bob! i need to be that person!

girl haircuts are more about personal philosophy than general grooming.

chicago fact

a lost button of a memory: the snow covered streets of chicago were cluttered with broken, twisted umbrellas.

before xmas parties

this party was east of carlisle.

we drank daintily with our fragile fingertips barely grasping the glassware stems.

then chugged a few and headed down to amelia's house, west of girard.

remember last time we were at this house? no? no? no? no? oh yes, that's because i don't post pics from this pad. it's just easier to refer you to clips from metropolitan. watch:

as it actually is, her house parties are bourgeois. same people. same haughty, insipid conversations. same self-consciousness. i certainly don't want to be at a beer pong party, but i may as well be. wah wah. and if you don't agree, you're one of them!!! you think you're more fascinating than you actually are. lol.

eh. we all make that same mistake. and anyway, she always sets out that great hummus dip.

bill was phone tutoring a poor norwegian child the WHOLE TIME WE WERE THERE! can you handle the exigency?

mean word game

the MEAN WORD GAME, also known as the mean game, has very simple rules:

1. gather a group of people and choose who goes first.
2. have everyone else write an honest statement about that person on a sheet of paper.
3. let the person whom it's about, read aloud every single anonymous comment.
4. move on to the next person, repeating steps 2 and 3, until everyone has had a turn.

the unwritten variables make it interesting, but mostly destructive. the honest rule quickly becomes vicious and exaggerated critiques. "your nose is slightly off-center" is directly proportional to "consider suicide, you asymmetrical piece of shit" in the mean game.

this game is seldom played among the same people. it's unnecessary. your memories of being told how worthless of a human being you are last quite a while.