Brothers

Well. School ended.

All I could think about for weeks were the party hats and buckets of beer I'd celebrate with after finals. Crepe paper crowns and glorious party dresses and whatnot. I drove home after school, made a cd and then went to Marble where a leathery lesbian talked to me about potatoes under a heater lamp. If there's anything opposite to a bachelorette party, my finals celebratory night was it.

I-40 East near Grants.

Crazy town.

Brothers.

It's not every day you get to hold a brain. Maybe unless you're a production assistant on Red Asphalt XI. Or a brain surgeon. Oh, that reminds me, I made up a joke about a harp-playing spinal nerve doctor that I won't subject you to. You're welcome.

Is it strange to be delighted by normal life? Question marks, blah, anyway. El novio and I are going to the museum free day and then making bathtub kahlua at lucky's. And I threw out all my clothes again. Expect a long coming fashion post.

we meet at last

Good news and bad news, guys. Which one do you want first? Dot dot dot how about bad news: No brewskies at Brickyard this evening. Good news:
I found a size 8 pair of GOLD PLATFORM SANDALS FOR $5 AT GOODWILL. Obvies I am putting them to good use and wearing them downtown tonight. Jager shots all around please. Groan. CU 2morrow! Bring shades and advil.

things you don't need to know

I am against laundry today.
I'd much rather buy new knickers, wash them with body soap in the sink and dry em with my blow dryer while the cats run up the wall and bite strange objects (like a suitcase zipper or Robert Pattinson calendar (they don't understand the point of the blow dryer sound therefore regressing to primitive wild cat behavior whenever they hear it)).

I know it would take less energy to just go to the laundromat but this will be my extravagance of the week. Is it strange how laundromat is spelled? Wiki says it is a genericized trademark (like Kleenex for tissues) from an Electric Company and in the UK they say 'launderettes' so since I don't understand the point of a continued use of genericized trademarks I will regress to my primitive wild cat behavior too and call it a launderette!

heat wave oh-ten

The heatwave of 2010 (or as Marc says "oh-ten") is here and making Albuquerque feel like a foil-wrapped sweet potato on a grill. A chile relleno in a fryer. A rainbow trout sizzling in a pan. And we are those fried fat globs that come with the disgusting Long John Silvers' dump fish. That reminds me... Marc and I were so wretchedly hot last night we couldn't sleep so we read aloud from my urban legends book. The story we picked, called Dunkin' Dumps, was about a man who ate tainted mussels donuts at a hotel, had diarrhea in their kiddie pool while people were in it and sued the hotel. Afterward, we both agreed to sell the book at Jay's next yard sale.

102 degrees yesterday, 100 today and 100 on Tuesday. Damn.

Goodbyes at Gecko's.

Hot doggies at Gold and whatever.

Weekend night at Imbibe. The girl to guy ratio was seriously weird.

Carl-oooooohs at Monte Vista hot plate.

Sweltering hot Sunday:

Sweating balls.

Sir Chomps!!!

Curly tail!

We waited until oven house cooled off before we went back in and realized the really pretty sunset out front.

It felt like our reward for putting up with the heatwave :)

So pretty we forgot to close the door before the swarms of cockroaches ran inside. Lovely.

when my camera's full of pictures my blog is full of words

Mother's Day was spent at the Putt Putt on San Mateo and McLeod (I hate how that neighborhood does not have a charming name such as Student Ghetto, Pearl District, or Miracle Mile.) Our golf balls were construction cone orange, jelly bean green, candy banana yellow and heavy metal black. Afterward we paid full price to watch Kick-Ass. My review: Watch Almost Famous instead of Kick-Ass. Watch Sin City instead of Kick-Ass. Watch Ghost World instead of Kick-Ass.

Did I tell you that we've made Blackbird our new go-to bar? It smells less like fecal matter than Burt's and still retains the classic dive bar bathroom door graffiti. I have a feeling the asshole bartender will drive us out.

We walked to the University to loot the dorm dumpsters. This would be the night we got caught by campus police.

Congrats, you're not pregnant.

The coppers made us put back our hula hoops, box of 60 unused condoms, three pairs of Levi's and a vacuum cleaner and ordered us off campus.

Crazytown. It's already 2010?

Mazel tov.

I inappropriately did not wear a bra underneath that gleaming and shiny fabric. I looked like a 70s porno movie cover so I dug around in the trunk and found a gray blazer. Size little boy. The last high school graduation I went to was my sissy's 4 years ago. I had orange hair and smaller boobs. My own high school graduation was between watch C-SPAN and vacuum under the chairs in my things I couldn't care less about list. I wore my terrible glasses, didn't brush my teeth and read the Albuquerque Journal during the whole thing. I wish I would have paid more attention. Probably doesn't matter, right? Right.

We sat around in the country whistling into grass blades. Flipping coins into the kiddie pool. Eating watermelon and cake.

Scary. I look like the love child between the two sheeples on either side of me. Funny ha-ha and funny sad-sad. I bet my parents were pleased that they bought another roll of school pics where I intentionally frowned.

Bachelorette Party Number Two.

Somewhere out there there is a young lady who misplaced her bachelorette party. It's ok, love, we have it right here. We'll go ahead and use it for you. Byeeeeeeeeee!!!

I highly recommend this cigar whatever its name, brand, flavor, size and diameter are.

Funny ha-ha.

Isotopes vs. Reno Aces. Game stats: Isotopes won 2 to 0. A choir sang the national anthem. Taco won the race. We sat behind a row of two large christian families and lamented about their poor childrens' future sex life. Highly inappropriate, highly entertaining. We counted 6 mullets, 2 screaming babies, 1 Kat Von D look-a-like, 1 father with a mohawk, 16 MILFs and countless dads eyeing my round tits. I think they can sense the decaying youth on me. Oh, also they sell veggie dogs at the park now but they're $5 so yeah right like I'm gonna pay that. I'll just chew on a wet paper towel. Same flavor.

Birthday picnic was a great success. It rained on everything and sort of ruined the salsa and blankets but we laughed through everything and got soaked and rolled with the punches, not letting anything ruin a beautiful day. Feels powerful to not let anything affect you. Maybe this is what it feels like to be a dimwitted boy, i.e. a boy.

My only wedding snap. Wedding wedding wedding. Wedding? Wedding wedding wedding wedding wedding wedding. Wedding wedding wedding! Wedding, hahaha, wedding! Wedding.

We packed up our sacks and bags like where's waldo and went hiking on Memorial Day. 'Tis nice.

That night after Tim's backyard bbq we drove to Jay's lovely neighborhood and walked to O'neils. I've decided I'm over bars, pubs and house parties. I want to spend the summer on the streets.

You get 2 out of 3 stars for posture. Needs improvement.