one eye closed kind of night

Last Saturday was a biggie. Steven's birthday festivities. Getting kicked out of a karaoke bar. Meeting a new guy. read on.

Us, cuties, sat in le hot tub for a while. S tried his best to look at our eyes when talking to us. What do u think happened?

Conversations lulled to memories about their high school daze.

I pouted like an asshole and hummed a radiohead tune. How highschool of me.

Apparently, the burlesque class taught us something ...

Then we were wasted enough for karaoke. Jess's mom drove us there. Si, Rukey and I sang Hey Jealousy.

I try to be an adult around this guy, but I keep thinking back to the hillbilly party at jessica's. Remember?

Damn, I forget what song was on during this emotional gesturing. Maybe "once, twice, three times a lady?"

Girls Just Wanna have Fun possibly.

chest hair. drool.

Doesn't it look like Christopher Lloyd is sitting in the booth in the background?

Yikes. This is not good. Also, did simon get shot in the chest? haha.

Basically, they cut off Jessica at Ed's and she turned into a whirlwind force and defiantly drank Sam's beer in front of the bartenders face. lol. Except, he ordered her out. Luke dropped us off at Evan's house. Who's evan?

Then I met a musician and the rest is for my dear diary ...

Oh wait. We went back to Jay bird's house and watched a comedian on the christian channel. I know I know, SLOW DOWN WITH THE DETAILS.

It was like that bubbly falling in love weird nervous happiness.

lust

Dios te salve, María. Llena eres de gracia.

claire's last night

we weren't going to let monday night fuck us over with the promise of the dreaded responsible early bedtime so we figured a few bloody marys at karaoke would suffice. we sat at the same old table. said hi to the same old waitress and can you believe it we acted like nothing waited for us outside of ed's pub.

we're slowly dying, huh? i'm old.
nothing makes you feel older than going to a dive bar where the median age is 44 and then not even being the youngest group there. yes john john, there was a crowd of kids there younger than our 22 to 24 group. i'm blaming it on tres' 29 yo gf. although yea i'm feeling superficial enough to say the addition of jess, claire and me made up in beauty what we lacked in youthfulness.
i believe also it was tres' birthday. i wanted to sing procol harem's white shade of pale. man. that song always reminds me of my birthday ......

something about lonely birthdays when i was a lot younger. le sigh. it's all dear diary i guess. REPRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. moving on. seriously.
after everything can you believe it was the worst worst worst time i had ever had at karaoke?! simon fucked up his song with sam by not knowing any words so he just substituted that fact by screaming (SCREAMING!) into his microphone "OOH OOH AAH AAH" like that monkey sound?! the guy in charge made us go up on stage and sing HEY YA. YA THINK YA GOT IT? OH YOU THINK YOU GOT IT WELL GOT IT DON'T GET IT SOMETHING BLA BLA. fun, right?

no.

let's just agree the musical talent required to capture the styling of andre 3000 was completely lost on us mostly middle class white kids. it was watching a train wreck happen for over three minutes. we started the song in the middle of the karaoke floor and ended up mostly behind the screen. le sigh. and the worst part was when claire looked miserable and left early. i cried into my salty bloody m and had nightmares all night.

bizarro night

basically i forgot my camera at home when we all went to game night. tim marc jay luke maddie and me. we played trivial pursuit again for no apparent reason. perhaps we have a closet triv suit fantatic amongst us. we played a shitty 90s version of triv and there were no questions about dungeons and dragons, bad 70s bands or hello kitty or else marc jay and i would have won in five minutes. instead we lost but only by one pie. as usual. and bla bla it's ironic to be disdainful about knowing who ann richards is.

anyway. bad mood night. whatever.

i left and went to karaoke at ed's pub. jessica sam blaire laurel ewen tres steven and no named curly girl. and meeeeeeeee. laurel and curly sang uptown girl la la la la la la la something world .... what? ewan pretended to play guitar and sang something i already forgot. he should have sang sonic youth to fit his alien like whiteness. same color hair and skin?! it reminds me of this ken doll we had growing up. his hair color faded off cause we left him in a slimy pool for a couple weeks but his hair shape was still molded on the top of his head and voila aryan skin and hair. also, a car salesman sang the last song. a weird al song?! in what universe is it acceptable to sing a weird al song EVER? grrrr buzzkill.

so that was the end of the night. nothing very major. i decided since i don't have pics from the night i would post my favorite amy winehouse pictures from dlisted that crack me up. remember that one time winehouse was on the radio and luke was all 'man this is good' and we told him it was amy winehouse and he kinda just sat there in a somber state for a minute like god no, anything but that. yea we all have those moments. enjoy.
aaaaahahahahahhaha!
whaaaaaat is with her hiveeeee?!

oh and i almost forgot but going straight from cement block party at tim's to karaoke at ed's pub was bizarro episode of seinfeld. except no amount of pleasantries would make up for weird al song. WEIRD AL?!

lyrics on my mind

KARAOKEEEEEEEEEE! woooah woooah wooooah! when the lights go DOWN in the CITYY. and the SUN shines ON the BAYYYYY!
yea. went to ed's pub once again only this time ASH was there. yessssss.
damn fumbly fingers! i couldn't get the camera out and on when the lady of ahem older persuasion gave simey a backwards lap dance. she RAN HER FINGERS THROUGH HIS HAIR! aaaahahahahahahah!
apparently we went on the night there was a karaoke contest. it was between fake boob gretchen, lovely large lesbian lady, simon's private dancer granny, elderly man who kept WINKING at us and finally the curly haired woman who burnt holes into us with her eyes later in the night. to be fair she could do a mean evanescence impression.
oh gosh, the guy singing up front had bad bad bad napoleon complex. worse still, he was singing the sweetest country song with the most crumpled up angry face ever witnessed in albuquerque. and as audience members we did what we had to do. we screamed his name.

unfort, it forced his curly haired girlfriend to give us cancer by way of evil eyes.
okayyyyyy. we signed up to sing I'M A GENIE IN A BOTTLE you gotta rub me THE RIGHT WAY!
woooo-ooah woooo-ooah wooooah! gotta rub gotta rub gotta rub me the right way.
everyone at ed's pub got boners -especially the bartender - from the racy lyrics and sexed out dancing.so we also sang GO ON take the MONEY AND RUN by steve miller band. clap clap clap clap clap! jessica had no idea how to sing the song and the rest of us were slurring and drooling all over the microphones. whatevs. we tried to sign up simey to sign MIGHT AS WELL FACE IT! YOU'RE ADDICTED TO LOVVVVVE and we would have been the sexy red lipped guitar ladies in the background. does that make sense? but simon wouldn't do it so we tried to get him to sing these other gems:
DON'T SPEAK! I KNOW JUST WHAT YOU'RE SAYING! ... DON'T TELL ME CAUSE IT HURTZZ! by no doubt
and my personal fave: I KNOW WHAT BOYS WANT! I KNOW WHAT BOYS NEED. i know what boys want .... boys want ..... boys want .... ME.

needless to write, he wasn't exactly up for any of it.

and finally, ash named our girl group, ed's lady express. aaaahahahahahah! i think we also sang a britney spears song but it could have just been a dream.