we goin 2 rap 2nite

rap is playing their last show tonight at burt's tiki lounge. marc says they both play keytars so i guess that means it'll be a kind of dance party. 80s themed dance party. looking at their picture, one of them looks like barry watson from 7th heaven. the other one, I THINK, is this guy marc and i would see downtown all the time. he'd wear red sweatbands, 80's tiny track shorts, aviators and always smoking cigarettes. we'd call him 80's guy but did you know he also took a calculus class at unm. that story is most likely very inaccurate. oh wellsies. so we'll be there fo sho. see ya there.

four hour zoo

the albuquerque zoo has an easter thingy where they give the more dexterous animals hard boiled eggs and painted boxes filled with treats. i think they may have given them other easter presents but by the time we slopped out of bed and hungover-ly sauntered to the exhibits, pretty much every thing was ripped to shreds. regardless, sunday was that absolutely fab albuquerque spring day where the shade's too cool and the sunspots are too hot so you have to keep switching back and forth where you stand. marc got a sunburn on his face, hence the reason i keep asking why he looks so embarrassed. anyway.
the camera was acting wonky so we only got 500 pictures of flamingos and then 2 actually fairly good zoo pixures and then 250 pictures of me like the most self-absorbed wooser ever. note to self: find out if wooser is a word. so basically sorry bout the poor zoo pics.
did you know that knobby joint on the flamingo's leg is actually their ANKLE?! it looks like their knee but their foot is actually about 3 feet long.
yea. flamingos.
i don't remember seeing the music cage before. but we sat there while a child put a quarter in the machine and listened to the song 'under the sea' from the little mermaid. omg. steel drums! it played the song really well but there was no soul so it made me come up with another science fiction short story plot.
this is where we went into the reptile and amphibian building and there was a group of papas wearing cowboy hats speaking spanish with their children. kinda cute except when they would pound on the glasssssss. poor legless lizards!!!
actually. we met many many bad parents at the zoo which depressed me more than the whole looking at animals through cages aspect. one family had 3 young daughters who were throwing rocks at some small primates and the pill popping vicodin daddy just said 'no. stop. don't do that.' but read it like as slow as you can and with heavily sedated voice. and the mom was wearing a ratty fur (!!!) coat and just laughing at the hurt animals. she was probably on her 3rd long island ice tea.

then another kid was getting SO excited about the kangaroos and his mom was all 'ok. fine. COME ON LET'S GO.' like clamping his arm and dragging his whole body on the ground at 80 miles an hour.
it's kind of hard to see past the fence but there was a road runner eating a dead mouse in the macaw cage. circle of liiiiiiiife.
it's not really shitty pictures, it's just that we have 500 picture of basically the same animal. why didn't we think to take 500 pics of the giraffes or polar bear? who knows.
wait! oh yeah. there were two white bread couples kinda walking along with us near the tiger pit. i can't emphasize how white they were. here's an attempt: link! here's another attempt: they wore the white zinc oxide triangle on their nose, dress their children in SWEATER VESTS, were raging on about how great john mayer and tracey chapman and other adult contemporary is, hiking clothes in the CITY, and other unacceptable rich whitey behavior. one of their daughters was terrified of the tiger pit and the dad absolutely screamed at her to not be scared while dangling her over the EDGE of the bar. oh my gosh i nearly beat him over the head. then i remembered all the social problems white people have and felt bad. i can say this cause i'm half white. moving on.
so the whole cats area was freaking awesome so cool! i watched the lions cat nap for hours and we ran into a bunch of spanish speakers again and they kept saying 'meester cat! meester cat!' so we joined them and it became an OCELOT BLOCK PARTAY!
there was a strange little barn door right by the panther cage. the sign on it said 'kids only' but there was a padlock on it. when we looked into the kids only area, marc said it was probably where parents drop off their kids so they can poop on the ground. it's not that funny but i kept picturing all those bad kids drinking out of dirty water bowls and being hit by rocks.
koala bears. peacocks. kookaburra. the koala building was eucalyptus overload. so nice. marc told me that koala bears are cute and everything but they rip peoples' faces off instantly.
we saw elephants, giraffes, rhinos, sleepy jackals. my top favorites were the sea lions, seals, and vultures. you MUST see the vultures when you go to abq zoo. as soon as they lock eyes with you it's like faces of death. whatever. oh yeah, we also practiced all of these faces with an old chimpanzee and he did the face 3rd row down, center on us. if i were you, i would print out this picture below and practice all of them on the chimps. i wonder what the elderly grandpappy face means?
and zebrassssss! we saw zebras man.

baconator night and amelia's

let me just say saturday night started off with the worst most disgusting meal ever. not only did we have to cram five guys and one hot hot hot sex pot, yea that would be me, into marc's car to sit in the drive thru at wendy's, but at least two back seat passengers and one front seat passenger had like the worst gas in the universe. the only thing more nauseating than the smell was when simon said he could FEEL somebody else's FART because we were sitting SO CLOSE to each other. barf. luckily the automatic window roller down thingy is pretty fast or i would have smashed my head into the glass just to get some air.
baconator slime stain or offensively located piss stain?
then we went over to amelia's house with the peace sign garage door to meet everyone else. low key, sitting in a giant circle, chatter bugs.
simon's sitting like a mermaid!!
ok. so the shot below is blurry worthless cause i didn't want anyone to see i was taking a picture of amelia's hand like a psycho killer with hand fetish but come on. owww owwwwww! someone's getting snuggly.
then we all brushed our teeth and went to bed. i don't remember much about conversations at amelia's - we weren't there for long. wait, i guess chad put on that geggy tah song whoever you are at the end of the night and did you know that some volkswagen or honda commercial played that song in the early 2000's and then EVERYONE loved it. the pre-hipsters knew about it by word of mouth and i learned about it from that child molester dj on the edge 107.9 back in 1998. he wasn't really a child molester but when i called in to request silverchair, he asked me what i was wearing. and no, i don't think it was meant to be a joke. anyhow. chill evening.

crownpoint, new mexico

so auntie's 60th bday was saturday and we blew bubbles, looked for snakes, threw rocks off cliffs and ate. ATE SO MUCH. here are some navajo words i say very very often around my Diné family:

aoo' means yes, it's pronounced "oh" but quickly
shimasani means grandmother
na' means here, use it when handing something to someone
dooda means no, it's pronounced with loooong o's
gohwééh means coffee
yá'át'ééh means hello! and the word is its own sentence
łééchąą’í means dog and yea right it's almost impossible for me to teach you how to say it in written form because slash l isn't an english language sound and also, i don't say lééchaa’í often but it literally translates to poop eater
ahéhee' means thank you

so much more stuff ........ i'll write more later
and we found cool clearish rocks that are used to dye wool white on our hike. no one made fry bread this time but i did have the best shrimp kabobs everrrrrr. there were so many babies there and i forgot you have to watch them every second or else they will jump off a cliff or eat dirty dumpster jelly beans. crownpoint, new mexico: i'll see you again soon buddy.