so this last saturday was jessica's birthday bbq and pool party. and we got down. jess sam marc b. tim laurel skyler daniel p. marc r. marc r's older brother tres other bitches and me me!
i brought 6 bathing suit pieces JUST IN CASE. the infinitesimal triangle top bikini in case i drink enough to make myself feel good about fatty tum tum, neon green stripe thingy with ties, blue top i used to surf in so i know i can't fall out of it in case we would be doing handstand contests, a floral thingy and the metallic thing with obvious bottom issues: warning: only wear with full brazilian in case everything else broke, etc etc. oh yea and jessica's mom is so so so beautiful but i guess that's obvious.
like three tons of food and everything was homemade. cucumber thingys, jicama with red chile powder, potato salad, mozzarella slice thingys, pastry fruit dessert, fresh fruit, veggie burgers and of course HOT DOGS. hot dog. i ate at least five plates of food throughout the day.
we all got in the pool so i've now seen everyone's naked chests and they've seen my belly button and ass cheeks. we can move on to the next friendship step which is exposure to morning breath and crying in front of them. everyone wanted to play volleyball which i was ultra up for but it turned out to be pool basketball with retarded made up rules where you could ram the hoop into somebody's face and it became that aggressive shitty game where guys just rub their dicks on each other and make the girls feel worthless. that's my two cents. i played for about 15 seconds and stopped before anyone got their boner on me.yes, everyone thinks about boners while in the pool, it's not just me.
is there anything better than sitting in a crowded pool with cheap beer?
jess got out the hookah and we smoked watermelon stuff and then mint stuff. the mint stuff handcuffed our lungs. slightly intense.
oh yea. margarita's all day and night. no one got drunk though.
this is just the first of the may birthdays. steven's is tomorrow and mine is on the 28th. bonkers month.
0 comments:
Post a Comment