travel day nineteen

thursday december 4. day nineteen.

would you believe me that i woke up genuinely happy? it may have been the culmination of several events. the sun! sunshine! the strong heat. the straight radiation of sunshine fell on my skin. oh god. thank you! after oregon, i was suffering from vitamin d deficiency. lane and i sat next to the windows and let our skin absorb all the happy happy sunshine! sunlight! thank god! also, i had a dream about that guy. a good dream. and just so you don't think i masturbated on ashley's couch, no, it was not that kind of dream. innocent fun north country reminder of him. does he think of me? it almost doesn't matter.

le sigh.

i'm obsessed with their faucets. strange? not strange? not sure yet.

around 3 i finally got my lazy girl ass to put on the cold weather clothes. puffy red coat, black ski cap, big black gloves, knee high socks. lane told me how to get to the train from the apartment. walk down this street, turn left and you'll be at the jarvis stop. k. (please, brain, please remember these directions!)

on the way there i found out why no one should ever lick their lips out in this type of cold weather. so. yea. my tongue froze to my lips. but just for a second. turns out, it only takes a sec for me to panic about this.

took the train to noyse. look at this snow! ice! what?! this is amazing. the arctic air against my exposed face feels like birth. i'm invigorated. i'm new. i love chicago. it's amazing to experience this new feeling. this is what a real winter is like? it's frightening and loving all at once. it's waiting for toasty warm touches. it's walking through razor ice air. i love this place. i'm above myself about seeing the sunlight again.

can you see what everyone is wearing? it's bear fur. completely covered. no girl figures. i'm surprised by this. it's foreign to me. they cover their curves? where are their breasts? their hips? they're removed from the hourglass shape. it's unbelievable.

i only got lost once. it was when i was looking for the train back to jarvis. no one really walks around in the evanston neighborhood i was walking around so i couldn't just follow someone wiser. eventually i figured it out, but not before i became frustrated and bought a bottle of wine. and now, already, i'm getting a wine hangover. so good night. tomorrow will be more aspirational, i'm sure.