I guess one of my least favorite persons to interact with is ............... the male virgin. Especially as my friends and myself are in our MID-TWENTIES (!), it's like the combination of sexual anxiety, constant desperation and major blue balls that grosses me out to the max. It's like, stop hugging me for five seconds longer than a normal hug should last and go eff somebody! Seriously, go effing eff a pro if you need to and then get back to me so we can have an adult conversation. Yeesh. Is there anything more creepy than the 20+ year old male virgin?
Anyway.
I was kind of going insane in the membrane on Tuesday. Sick of applying to jobs and getting no responses. Sick of cleaning up after les chats. Sick of no friends. I decided put on my rain boots and act weird. Mar mar and jay jay tagged along.
I bought a pina colada at Burt's. It was dub night, which basically means a guy at the turntables plays only the bass part of a song. Pretty awful. All of us felt like stuffing the dried limes in our ears. Obviously left after five minutes. chug chug chug ...
We went to Monte Vista where 45 balding frat guys were drinking vodka cokes. There were seven girls in the whole bar and I was the only one with my nipples fully covered up. I felt so bad for the waitresses working there. The patrons all looked like the kind of person who doesn't tell their partner they have herpes. The bartenders looked pretty douchey too. It took me forever to get a drink cause I didn't look like a coke princess. Whatever. I was out to feel weird and act weird. You know, like getting out of your comfort zone. Feeling uncomfortable. That was the goal.
On the walk home I touched a long stick to Marc's penis ring while he was peeing and he chased me down the street.
I guess that's pretty weird.
I'm definitely not like the weirdest person ever, but I think I have a few greatly weird characteristics, which is really comforting. I love the awkward, uncomfortable moments. It's the best kind of pain.
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