everything but the candy

i was itching to wander the sloppy aisles of halloween decorations. we set our sights on target and then the dollar bin stores.
i accidentally licked the inside of this mask. ugggh. barf. luckily at target you can walk a few aisles down to the mouthwash section.

but not before i licked marc's face.
this child's goth cheerleader costume was mesmerizing. is it revolting? is it cute? i think they could have fixed the creepy lolita aspect by changing her come hither look with a goofy, i.e. normal, kid's smile.
i bought this guy. he was on sale. and it was something i didn't want to make myself. i started making my halloween decorations three years ago.
this is marc scaring the children out of the aisle.
ridiculous bucket section. you know you're a dick once you buy your spoiled brat a $12 velvet bucket for trick or treating. use a fucking pillowcase.

related note: can i has that hewwo kitty buckey?
this one cracked me up too. US diva costume. platform sandals, bedazzled camo and a shirt knot?
this sock monkey costume doesn't make sense. the face part is too narrow to be a hat, has no eye holes so it can't be a mask. but it's the perfect size for your brain. as in, removing the crown of your child's skull and putting the sock monkey head on it.
aaaaaaand. it wouldn't be a real trip to target if i didn't look at every other section.
an actual eraser attached to an actual usb? cool but also eww. only 1 gb?
we left target.

we then drove over to the big lots-fallas-dollar store shopping center on san mateo to look at their halloween stock. their stuff range from scary in a creepy way to scary in a disturbing way.
disturbing.
creepy.
creepy.
disturbing.
creepy.
disturbing.
disturbing.
normal.
creepy.
disturbing.
normal.
can you tell where this is?
we walked over to unm where m remarked that "everyone looks like pre-schoolers." i disagreed but only because i'm not old enough to have imaginary children in college. my imaginary children would be in kindergarten.
there were a ton of kids studying out by the duck pond. but only a few of them were actually studying, the rest were showing off their short shorts and boners to each other. college dorm rat hormones make me queasy.
do you know where this is?
we sat there until our bums were chilled and then went home for a hot chocolate with milk.